Alright, folks, let’s dive into the wonderful world of pickleball and why it’s the perfect sport for all you stoners out there. I mean, come on, it’s the only sport that combines the word “pickle” with the munchies-inducing powers of rowing and badminton. Need I say more?
Now, let’s talk about the competition. Sorry, frisbee enthusiasts, but running around like a pack of caffeinated squirrels just isn’t our style. And let’s be real, getting a dozen baked buddies to the park at the same time? Mission impossible.
Some lacrosse bros might try to claim the title, but let’s be honest, their intense workout routines don’t exactly go hand in hand with cannabis. Unless, of course, they’re downing protein shakes infused with high sativas like it’s a national sport.
But here’s the deal, my fellow pot aficionados: their time in the limelight is over. And who am I to make such a bold declaration, you ask? Well, I’ve been consuming and advocating for weed for decades, and I’ve been swinging that pickleball paddle for six years. I’ve played in tournaments, contributed to In Pickleball Magazine, and yes, I’ve even played on mushrooms. But that’s a story for another time, my friends.
Let’s get down to the nitty-gritty of why pickleball is the ideal activity for those who like to puff.
The Slower, the Better: Moving at Our Own Stoner Speed
Newbie pickle ballers often struggle with swinging too hard, sprinting too fast, and generally exhausting themselves. But us stoners, we’ve got that “not trying too hard” thing down pat. In fact, being calm, high, and collected can actually work to our advantage in this sport. Who knew?
Compete at Your Own Level
Finding a casual pickleball video game, game of basketball, hockey, or volleyball as an adult without someone going all high school hero and elbowing you in the face is like finding a unicorn. It’s just not gonna happen. But in pickleball, there’s so much action going on that you can easily find a group playing at a level you can handle, even when you’re blazed to the heavens.
Unity on The Court
Few things bring people together like cannabis and pickleball. Picture this: a college tennis player, a spry 55-year-old, and a lively octogenarian veteran all sharing the same court. It’s a beautiful sight, my friends. The only other place I’ve experienced that much diversity and fun is outside a weed convention. So why not combine the two? Brilliant, I know.
Bartenders Set The Tone
For some reason, the pickleball craze came with a side of liquor and spiked seltzers. Many clubs and courts even have bars built right in. It’s like they’re saying, “Hey, this is a social sports environment where people can loosen up.” So if alcohol fits the equation, you better believe that cannabis deserves a seat at the table. After all, dabs and sobriety don’t exactly go hand in hand.
Downtime is High Time
Unless you’re in a hardcore game-after-game marathon with your pals, the standard pickleball routine involves playing a game, taking a break in your trusty folding chair, and deciding when you’re ready for another round. No pressure whatsoever. When you’re done puffing, just grab that paddle and get back in the game.
Now, let’s address the downsides. Scoring can get a bit tricky when you’re swinging stoned and don’t even think about remembering whose turn it is to serve. But fear not, my friends, there’s a simple solution: designate at least one player in your crew as the sober scorekeeper. Problem solved!
Oh, and one last thing: stay out of that no-volley zone. Sadly, there are no snacks or ice cream waiting for us there. It’s a cruel world, I know. But fear not, fellow stoners, because pickleball is the ultimate sport for those who want to enjoy some high-flying fun with a side of laughter and good vibes. So grab your paddles, spark up your favorite strain, and let the games begin.
The Lax Bro Delusion: Calisthenics and Cannabis? No Thanks!
Now, let’s address those lax bros who might try to steal the limelight. Sure, they’re all about fitness and building those muscles, but let’s be real, that doesn’t align with our love for cannabis. Unless they’re spiking their protein shakes with high sativas, we’ll kindly pass on their high-intensity workouts. We prefer a sport where our mellow vibes can truly shine.
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FAQs
Absolutely! Pickleball’s relaxed pace, social atmosphere, and hilarious moments make it a perfect match for stoners looking to have a great time on the court.
Stoners love pickleball because it allows them to embrace their laid-back nature and enjoy the game without taking themselves too seriously. It’s all about having fun, sharing laughs, and creating unforgettable memories with fellow stoners.
Pickleball’s slower pace gives stoners the chance to fully appreciate each moment on the court. It allows them to take their time, soak in the hilarity of the game, and enjoy their high in a stress-free environment.
While there are no specific rules regarding playing pickleball while under the influence, it’s important to prioritize safety and respect for fellow players. Ensure that you’re still able to play responsibly and maintain good sportsmanship while enjoying your elevated state.
While there may not be any officially recognized stoner pickleball legends just yet, there are countless enthusiasts who have become local legends in their own right. These players infuse the sport with their unique style and add a touch of stoner charm to the pickleball community. Keep an eye out for these trailblazers who are taking pickleball to new highs.
Final Thoughts
In conclusion, my fellow high-flying pickleball enthusiasts, it’s clear that this sport is the epitome of stoner paradise. With its munchie-approved name, the ability to take it slow and steady, and the perfect blend of competition and camaraderie, pickleball has won our hearts (and our toked-up minds).
So, let’s embrace the joy of swinging paddles while swinging in our own little universe of bliss. Remember, it’s not just about the game—it’s about the laughs, the snacks, and the unforgettable moments shared with a diverse group of players who are all united by their love for both pickleball and the green herb.
As you navigate the pickleball court with a grin on your face and a joint in your hand, may your serves be as smooth as your tokes, and your shots as accurate as your aim for the snack bar. Let the sound of laughter echo through the courts, and let the scent of good vibes waft through the air.
Pickleball, my friends, is more than just a game. It’s a hilarious adventure that brings us together, one paddle swing and one puff at a time. So, embrace the silliness, embrace the joy, and let pickleball become your new favorite excuse to get baked and laugh until your abs hurt.
Now, go forth, my fellow pickleball stoners, and conquer the court with your unique blend of skill, laughter, and a touch of whimsical absurdity. And always remember: in the world of pickleball, it’s not just about the points—it’s about the priceless memories and the incredible friendships forged along the way. Stay lifted, stay funny, and keep on pickleball.
